Friday, July 13, 2018

Garrett Matthias, 5, coming back as a gorilla

A private burial of Garrett's ashes will be held at a later time once his parents figure out how the hell to get his ashes made into a tree and locate a nature preserve, so his tree resides in a protected area.

Saturday, June 30, 2018

Leonard Mason Smith, 86, died of 'none of your business'

Leonard Smith hated pointless bureaucracy, thoughtless inefficiency and bad ideas born of good intentions. He loved his wife, admired and respected his children and liked just about every dog he ever met. He will be greatly missed by those he loved and those who loved him. In lieu of flowers, the family asks that you cancel your subscription to The New York Times.

‘New York Times’ Obit Writer Margalit Fox Retires

In the summer of 1994, I joined The Times as a copy editor on the Sunday Book Review. It was a marvelous section, awash in smart, lively colleagues and enticing, tottering stacks of books. But I pined for a writing job, and as my years on the copy desk wore on, I feared my own epitaph would say little more than “She changed 50,000 commas into semicolons.” (H/T Peter Elikann)

Saturday, June 16, 2018

Mary Farrell left one crossword puzzle unsolved

A ruthless Scrabble opponent, and a dogged master of crosswords, we send her home with one last puzzle: 1. Where Mary has gone. 2. It comes in iron or a legal folder. 3. Hank's credo " ______ give an inch". 4. Bumble ___. 5. English beverage, with a pronoun. 6. Opposite of 'different'. (H/T Peter Elikann)

Wednesday, February 21, 2018

Heather Lynn Davis, 47, ‘did not complain. Much.’

She was born on July 28, 1973 and adopted shortly thereafter by Walter and Rose Neal. Turns out you really can choose your family. Upon realizing that she’d proven that piece of conventional wisdom wrong, she decided to make proving the world wrong her life’s goal. (H/T to Carol Snyder Foltz)

Wednesday, February 14, 2018

Mary Therese O’Connell, ‘found joy in the little things, her husband’s endowments not included’

Mary Therese O’Connell (aka “Puddy,” “Mommo,” or “that weird woman who is so nice to me”), shuffled off her motor oil on Feb. 10, 2018, passing away suddenly and peacefully where she excelled — in bed. (H/T Carol Snyder Foltz)