Nancy Lee Hixon, asks that you 'please pray for the Constitution of the United States'

In addition to being a teetotaling mother and an indifferent housekeeper, she was a board certified naturopath specializing in poisonous and medicinal plants; but she would like to point out, posthumously, that although it did occur to her, she never spiked anyone's tea.

Thomas Lee Flanigan, 48, rode off ridden off into the glorious sunset

Well, that's it. I have completed my shift as the great American cliché.

Ken Fuson, 63, 'never one to be guided by wisdom'

In his newspaper work, Ken won several national feature-writing awards, including the Ernie Pyle Award, ASNE Distinguished Writing Award, National Headliner Award, Missouri Award (twice) and Distinguished Writing Award in the Best of Gannett contest (five times, but who's counting?). No, he didn't win a Pulitzer Prize, but he's dead now, so get off his back. (H/T Marianne Lentini-Bernaduci)

Garrett Matthias, 5, coming back as a gorilla

A private burial of Garrett's ashes will be held at a later time once his parents figure out how the hell to get his ashes made into a tree and locate a nature preserve, so his tree resides in a protected area.

Mark Mooney’s last byline

If you are reading this, that means that I am no longer here. The prostate cancer finished toying with me on October 6, 2017. I was 66 and glad to be done with the damn disease.

Jeanne Swatzburg, 73, 'had an amazing time'

Well, let me tell you! I had an amazing time while I was here on Earth. Sadly, there were other plans for me and I had to leave my physical form at Yale New Haven Hospital, at age 73, on Aug. 26, 2017.

Minor Rootes, 86, leaves us with an Amazonian Indian word

At this reading, my existence or non-existence will be in another realm. During my 86 years of life, I look back with few regrets though I know I have some forgotten apologies to bestow on people I have slighted. Please accept. (H/T to Bridget Norman)

'Wall Street Journal' catches up to us, includes several that have appeared here

Regular readers of obituaries know the clichés—the departed were courageous, charitable, devoted to their families. Then there was the death notice for Wayne Brockey, a retired wood-plant manager in Klamath Falls, Ore. The obituary, written by a grandson, opens by alluding to the deceased’s penchant for ordering gadgets and clothing touted by TV pitchmen: “QVC lost a loyal customer on Sept. 28, 2016.”

Jean E. Oddi, 91, "saw it all, did it all, and had a ball!

I was born. I lived. I died. I hate to admit it, but evidently I died. I guess, after all these years, God finally figured out where to put me. I should have known the end was near after I had to be in room # 20 in the emergency room. I hate even numbers. I'm leaving behind a hell of a lot of stuff Casey and Melissa will have to get rid of. So, if you're looking for random crap, you should wait the appropriate amount of time and get in touch with them. (H/T Peter Elikann)

Angus B. MacDonald, 67, 'Pretty nice guy'

So, the world doesn't have Angus MacDonald to kick around anymore. I'm gone! The devil finally called my name. The grim reaper came for me on Friday March 25,2016. I bought the farm. I bit the dust. So I guess I'm off to the promised land eh? The promised land! Imagine!

Emily DeBrayda Phillips pens the story of her life

It pains me to admit it, but apparently, I have passed away. Everyone told me it would happen one day but that's simply not something I wanted to hear, much less experience. Once again I didn't get things my way! That's been the story of my life all my life. (H/T Lisa Sayers)

Henry Norman Saurage III, left behind a sense of humor

I was sad to leave behind my wonderful high school sweetheart and devoted wife of 57 years, Donna Maddox Saurage. However I died at peace after hearing her say, "When you're gone, I don't want another husband . . . I want a dog!"

Margaret (Marge) Aitken Holcombe, 84, leaves a witty selfie

I died at Hilton Head Hospital from a wide assortment of ailments on Tuesday, August 12, 2014. When a friend facetiously asked if I was writing my obituary before or after I passed away, I told her "Carol, I know my limitations."

Stig Kernell, 92, writes short, sweet obit

A Swedish man elected to keep the news of his death short and sweet, instructing a funeral agency to publish an obituary containing only the words 'I am dead', grabbing national headlines in the process. (H/T to Tanya Irwin

Virginia M. Hicks, 90, reprimands friends from beyond the grave

There will be no viewing, no funeral services. You should have all visited me with kind attention when I needed you to put a smile on my face and love in my heart. (H/T Jim Romenesko)

Jane Catherine Lotter, 60, got to write her own obit

I was given the gift of life, and now I have to give it back. This is hard. But I was a lucky woman, who led a lucky existence, and for this I am grateful. I first got sick in January 2010. When the cancer recurred last year and was terminal, I decided to be joyful about having had a full life, rather than sad about having to die. Amazingly, this outlook worked for me. (Well, you know, most of the time.) Meditation and the study of Buddhist philosophy also helped me accept what I could not change. At any rate, I am at peace. And on that upbeat note, I take my mortal leave of this rollicking, revolving world-this sun, that moon, that walk around Green Lake, that stroll through the Pike Place Market, the memory of a child's hand in mine.

Another way to look at luxury ...

Since I have the luxury of a terminal illness and the experience of having been an obituary writer I have chosen to write my own obituary.

(H/T to Jan Peterson!)

Another autobituary! What a way to go ...

Howdy! Howdy! Howdy!

Check it out.

Way to go! New wordage

"prebituary
n. An obituary composed or published prior to a person's death; a prediction of failure, particularly of a political candidate. Also: pre-bituary."

Hat tip to Thom Forbes for this one. Just this morning, thinking on this, I coined a word: Autobituary. When you write your own obituary. Like?